i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
