I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
that's an acceptable place to lick
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
