i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize