So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
