Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
