When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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