I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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