I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
