I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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