Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
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