If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.