how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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