Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
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Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
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They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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