tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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