K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
