I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
