Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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