So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
