Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
