Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
