He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
