don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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