Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
