I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
