Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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