Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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