New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize