peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
my sisters under your porch take her home
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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