I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize