He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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