We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I can't turn off my feet"
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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