Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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