How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize