It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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