Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I am one with the molecules
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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