Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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