hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
