I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Just pee around me
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
