So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I am one with the molecules
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