'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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