I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
