Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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