Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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