just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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