I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Randomize