Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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