i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
