My first STD was from a foam party
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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