I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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