just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
